Purity: Conclusion

Today marks the final day of our purity study. Are any of you encouraged? Challenged? I am!

As the finale of our Purity Study, I would like everyone to share something that God used to speak to their hearts whether it was a verse, a quote, a sentence or two from an article, or an article itself. I encourage you to comment your thoughts!

Blessings to each of you girls as you ponder this important area of your life.

~Ana Renee

Matthew 5:8

Scripture shared by "Rubies Like Ruth" reader, Miriam S. Read about her here.

"Blessed are the pure in heart: 

for they shall see God."

(Matthew 5:8)

The First Kiss

Art from reusableart.com

By Ana Renee

There are many questions about “saving my first kiss.” Some girls guard their first kiss with vigor; others see no need for this “extra step” and give away kisses lightheartedly.

One of my favorite books, Lady in Waiting (by Jackie Kendall and Debby Jones) states a sobering truth that I believe every girl must ponder. “All the kisses you give before marriage and all the kisses you give after marriage express the love that belongs to one person: your knight.”

I think we can take this a step further: every kiss, every hug, every dream, and every endearment we laden on any guy-friend is one kiss, hug, dream, and endearment that should have been given to our husband after marriage.

Proverbs 10:12 says, “She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.” All the days of her life! Even before she knows him . . . before she loves him . . . before she marries him.

Are you doing your husband good?

{Note: I have quoted from Lady in Waiting, however, I cannot endorse this book to any young girl because of content it covers. Please ask your mom to proof-read it before you}

Colossians 3:1-3

If ye then be risen with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ sitteth on the right hand of God.

Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth.

For ye are dead, and your life is hid with Christ in God.

Colossians 3:1-3

Photo by Amanda T.

Encouraging Tid-Bit

Set high standards of purity, and with God as your accountability partner, do not compromise for anything.

Image from reusableart.com

Who's Running This Life??

By Ana Renee

Wait a second. I thought this month’s theme was purity? Did someone accidentally schedule this post?

Perhaps I should explain my seemingly random choice of topic. Choices made based on our feelings, emotions, and intellect are a reflection of “self” running one’s life. Yielding our feelings, emotions, and intellect to God’s will and basing our actions on His Word is a reflection of God running one’s life.

Purity is one of those areas that can be saved or shipwrecked depending upon who is in control. Galatians 5:22-23 lists qualities that are a reflection of us living according to God’s Word: “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.”

If you notice, the conduct of a person not living according to God’s Word is listed previously: “Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness, Idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions, heresies, Envyings, murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like: of the which I tell you before, as I have also told you in time past, that they which do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God.” (Galatians 5:19-21)

The first three “works of the flesh” are specific points that reflect a lack of purity: “adultery, fornication, uncleanness.”

Galatians goes on to say, “And they that are Christ's have crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts. If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit.” (verses 24-25) If we are true followers of Christ, then we should not be running our lives! We should be walking in God’s Spirit.

Photo by Amanda T.

So, how does this affect purity? I will give you just two examples.

I will save all of my affections for after marriage

Flesh:

       “But I’m going to marry him anyway!”

       {Fill in the blank with any excuse}

Bible:

        “Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.” (Proverbs 4:23)

        “Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.” (Hebrews 13:4)

         “Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman. Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.” (1 Corinthians 7:1-2)

I will keep my thoughts pure

Flesh:

       “It really doesn’t matter if I think about him; after all, he might be my husband.”

       "Thoughts don't affect me"

       {Fill in the blank with any excuse}

Bible:

       “. . . for the LORD searcheth all hearts, and understandeth all the imaginations of the thoughts . . .” (1 Chronicles 28:9)

      “Thou knowest my downsitting and mine uprising, Thou understandest my thought afar off.” (Psalm 139:2)

      “Hell and destruction are before the LORD: how much more then the hearts of the children of men?” (Proverbs 15:11)

      “Neither is there any creature that is not manifest in [God’s] sight: but all things are naked and opened unto the eyes of him with whom we have to do.” (Hebrews 4:13)

These two examples are very clear pictures of what can happen when we leave our decisions up to our fleshly lusts and desires. To keep us from making unwise decisions, God has given us His Word. It is our light (Psalm 119:105), our counselor (Psalm 119:24), and our guide (Psalm 73:24). But if we neglect to use it, we will be left in the dark without counsel and guidance. It is our responsibility to study the Bible and ask God for direction (2 Timothy 2:15).

Spirit-controlled choices are based on God’s Word and His guidance. Flesh-controlled choices are based on emotions, feelings, and intellect.

Who is running your life?

Incline my heart unto Thy testimonies, and not to covetousness.

Psalm 119:36

Dreams

Photo by Amanda T.

“We so easily allow our thoughts and emotions to be caught up in various ‘knights,’ 

using our time to dream about what could be, rather than concentrating on what is.”

“Tomorrow’s hopes fog our concentration for today.”

 (His Chosen Bride, by Jennifer Lamp)

The Practical Part of Purity

By Ana Renee

Photos by Amanda T.

Dedicating to stay pure in our single years is one of the best decisions that we can make, but it is not without its struggles. We live life, and things come across our path to challenge us in our commitment. The question God has shown me to ask is, “What should I do with the things that come across my way?”

For example, I have found that for my personal walk in purity, there are some things that I know challenge me:

         ~Movies with romance

         ~Books with romance

         ~Daydreams

         ~Neglecting my time with God

Each of those temptations come across my path fairly regularly – some more than others. Though I do not always respond in the proper way, God is always gracious to help me when I stumble and fall. Each of these steps takes prayer, determination, and God’s help to get through, but it is so worth it!

Here are some suggestions to combat these temptations:

         ~When a movie or book comes up that has questionable material (or material that will cause me to struggle), I do not have to watch or read it! There is always the option of leaving the room with the TV or putting down the book and finding something else to do.

         ~When a thought comes through my mind that is not pure, I do not have to dwell on it or feed it. Instead, I can quote Scripture, sing a hymn, or pray for someone that I know.

 

         ~When I am tempted to neglect my time in God’s Word, I can push away my other desires and do it anyway. I must realize that satan waits to tempt believers when we are not faithful to spend time with God.

There are other areas that you might personally struggle with. Pray and ask God to show you those areas and give you creative ways to work through them. It might take time and a lot of trial and error, but in the end it will pay off. If we are really serious about purity, we will work as hard as we can to keep our actions, words, and thoughts pure.

“I will behave myself wisely in a perfect way. O when wilt thou come unto me? I will walk within my house with a perfect heart. I will set no wicked thing before mine eyes: I hate the work of them that turn aside; it shall not cleave to me.”

Psalm 101:2-3

James 4:8

Photo by Amanda T.

Draw nigh to God, and He will draw nigh to you. 

Cleanse your hands, ye sinners; 

and purify your hearts, ye double minded.

James 4:8

Psalm 119:9, 11

Photo by Amanda T.

Wherewithal shall a young man cleanse his way? by taking heed thereto according to Thy Word.

Thy Word have I hid in mine heart, that I might not sin against Thee.

Psalm 119:9, 11

What if I Already Messed Up? {Part Two}

By Guest Writer, Jordan Elizabeth

{Continued from yesterday}

Yes, there are Christian girls who have already ‘messed up’, or who have gone willingly down the wrong path leading toward sin and are now sorry. What do we say to our sister who has given away her purity, who no longer measures up to the standard we have set? What do we say if we are that sister?

Is hope left for someone who has made a big mistake?

Short rabbit trail: Define big. Tell me a story, plot your scheme well, because I don’t demand of you a tri­fling tale of an accident of which you had no control. Explain why a “Big” mistake, a big sin, changes the gospel message. All sin separates us from God. Jesus died for the angry thoughts as well as the murder; He died for our bad attitudes as well as our bad actions. He died for the women who compromised themselves physically as well as for the girls who never kissed a boy until their wedding day.

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Yes, tell me how big the sin was, but also let me tell you how big God’s grace is. He can more than handle impurity. He didn’t come to call the righteous, but the sinners to repentance. He came to take the impu­rity from us and clothe us in His righteousness. He has provided a way through repentance for us to go on serving Him from where we are, not where we would have been. He is a loving, gracious, and an ALL-POWERFUL God. He can give us grace to move on.

 For ye were sometimes darkness, but now are ye light in the Lord: walk as children of light: (For the fruit of the Spirit is in all good­ness and righteousness and truth ;) Ephesians 5:8-9

However true this is (and it is), there is still a problem. Sin, in all of its deceptive non-glory and ugliness, is discouraging. I believe everyone has asked themselves this question before: Why bother going on trying to ‘do good’, to be pure, as it were, if it’s really too late. I can never get it back, so why should I care?

True believers, repentant Chris­tians who are brought to the understanding don’t choose to sin because they know God will forgive them, we choose not to sin because we know God has forgiven us.

As it is written, there is none righteous, no not one: There is none that understandeth, there is none that seeketh after God. Romans 3:10

In God’s view, there is none who is truly pure, none who is without blemish, who is ‘clean’. Only through Him can we be given purity and righteousness. Our seeking to be pure in our lives is a reflection of His purity in us, showing an understanding of God’s law and God’s forgiveness; showing that we love Him and desire to please Him.

I in them, and thou in me, that they may be made perfect in one; and that the world may know that thou has sent me and has loved them, as thou hast love me. John 17:23

All of his children are under grace. All of His people are redeemed from wickedness. All have been given the purity of Jesus. Those who have sinned ‘more’ or in different ways than others are great examples of His sav­ing glory; those who have been spared much sin and heartache are also a great picture of God’s mercy and love.

That the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, may give unto you the spirit of wisdom and revela­tion in the knowledge of him: the eyes of your understanding being enlightened; that ye may know what is the hope of his calling, and what the riches of the glory of his inheritance in the saints, and what is the exceeding greatness of his power to us-ward who believe, according to the working of his mighty power.

Ephesians 1:17-19

What if I Already Messed Up? {Part One}

By Guest Writer, Jordan Elizabeth

Art from resuableart.com

If there is one thing that is easy to do, it is to mess up. It is also easy to get discouraged when we have made mistakes or sinned willfully. When we mess up, that is, when we don’t live up to our expectations or someone else’s desires, we tend to lose heart. When we genuinely are sorry for actions and thoughts we have had, it is difficult to move past the hurt that occurs.

For godly sorrow worketh re­pentance to salvation not to be repented of: but the sorrow of the world worketh death. II Corinthi­ans 7:10

Purity is a by-word today in the Christian culture, and rightly so. But what makes purity im­portant? Why is it so hard to achieve? And what do you do when it’s ‘too late’ for you? As God’s people, we love what He loves and desire what He desires. He places high emphasis on purity.

We need to have purity in our actions, in our motives, and in our thoughts. Purity of doctrine, purity of heart, purity in worship; all these things must be true and pure and untainted by sin. In more recent times however, purity is primar­ily understood in context of physical and emotional purity in relationships between men and women.

But fornication, and all uncleanness, or covetousness, let it not be once named among you, as becometh saints. Ephesians 5:3

But…

In older, more Christian times, women were valued deeply because people understood that God had made them to be a crown of glory for their husbands and fathers. The purity, or virtue, of a maiden was cause enough for a war, it was important enough to lay down your life to defend it. Even the ancient and pagan Romans placed great importance on physical purity for their women, but not always did they have a Biblical solution to the problem. With the Hebrews, God placed women in families to be protected and loved by men because they were valued, we were important and were fulfilling our own calling.

In many countries, baby girls are aborted or left to die. The importance of protecting girls from evil is lost; even in America, so many find themselves fending for themselves in a lost environment.

What is the outcome? Girls are devoid of protection and lose their purity; they have something taken from them that cannot be replaced, and they lose it to a lie. Young men are robbed of purity- the enemy of our souls desires to destroy purity in the world and he wants to destroy the people of God as well.

In any case, God’s people have taken a stand for it now in our day and age as they did in time past. We know that it is important to save our bodies and our love for the person we marry so that we can be a true picture of Christ and His Church.

Countless couples have come together in godliness and purity to honor God in their relationships. Count­less small groups have been started, conferences have been held, and books written on this topic. We know what is right to do.

But…

Yes, there are Christian girls who have already ‘messed up’, or who have gone willingly down the wrong path leading toward sin and are now sorry. What do we say to our sister who has given away her purity, who no longer measures up to the standard we have set? What do we say if we are that sister?

Is hope left for someone who has made a big mistake?

{To Be Continued Tomorrow . . .}

~~~

Miss Jordan Elizabeth writes for her blog, Fly FAR {For All Righteousness}

1 Corinthians 7:34

There is difference also between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman careth for the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit: but she that is married careth for the things of the world, how she may please her husband.

1 Corinthians 7:34

A Gift to Offer

“One of the best gifts that can be offered to both the Lord and a husband is 

purity of heart, soul and body.” 

(His Chosen Bride, by Jennifer Lamp)

Photo by Amanda T.

Philippians 4:8

Verse shared by "Rubies Like Ruth" reader, Miriam S. Read about her here.

"Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things."

(Philippians 4:8)

Saving Our Gift

By Guest Writer, Amanda T.

One word that sends a thrill of excitement through any girl is the word “wedding.” Most of us cannot wait for that special day when we shall become the wife of a handsome young man.

The first “wedding” took place in Genesis 2, when God brought Eve to Adam to be his wife. Eve was a gift to her husband just like each of us girls will be a gift to some young man. How special it will be for our dad to walk us up the aisle and present us as a gift to our husband.

Photos by Amanda T.

Here, we must stop dreaming and ask a sobering question: in what shape will this present be when our husband receives it? I do not mean will we be slender and attractive; we must look deeper – on the inside. Will our heart be pure and reserved only for our husband? Or will we be tattered and worn from living a life of “play” with every handsome young man we meet?

If you picture a gift, you might think of a beautiful package with shiny, unmarred wrapping and ribbons tied at the top. Change this picture to a young girl. She is pure in heart with innocence hovering over her like ribbons. This young lady reaches her early teens and her perspective of life changes. She notices that there are handsome, likeable boys that are more than willing to give her attention. So, she dangles a ribbon in their face, tempting them, saying, “You want to get a peek of what I’m like?”  This is called flirting. Many boys react to this flirting by accepting the young girl’s offer. Often, this step is repeated again and again, until the ribbons are all frayed, tattered, or torn from pulls by young men.

As a girl gets older, she begins to “date around” to find her husband. Instead of living a life of peace and contentment, her life is filled with worries about “Will he like me? What if he breaks up with me?” In the meanwhile, her wrapping is getting soiled and perhaps torn in places.

Finally, “Mr. Right” comes and the girl proceeds to her wedding. When her husband receives this gift on their wedding day, it is no longer the beautiful package we first saw – pure and innocent – with clean wrapping and delightful ribbons. Instead, it is marred and in need of repair. What godly young man would like to receive such a gift?

For those of you who have not dangled your ribbons before boys; let me challenge you to stay pure! Do not worry about “catching” young men’s attention!! Instead, focus on serving the Lord and let Him bring your future husband to you. Purity is a gift that once opened, can never be re-wrapped in the perfect way it was before.

For those of you who have already spent your life flirting and worrying about attracting boys, may I challenge you to consider the path your feet are taking you! If the Lord is asking you to save your heart for the one young man that will become your husband, please hearken to Him! He will forgive and mend the broken heart and is so ready to help your feet find a straighter, safer path on which to travel.

“Keep (Guard) thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.” (Proverbs 4:20) You have a precious gift in your hands . . . will you purpose to keep it pure and clean for your husband?

~~~

Guest Writer Amanda Tero:

"My dad is the pastor of a Baptist church; Mom has been home-schooling us for twenty-three years; I am the fifth home-schooled graduate in our family of twelve and am waiting on the Lord's timing for marriage. Until He shows me a different path, I enjoy teaching piano, playing for our church congregation, arranging hymns, learning more about music, writing, taking pictures, and helping out around the house. My family and I have sung and played instruments (guitar, banjo, violin, mandolin, and others) together for the past eleven years. God has opened the doors for us to share His love through song in the local nursing home and Council on Aging as well as various churches around our area and in a few other states.
You can visit our family blog at www.terofamilyministries.com."

Guarding our Heart

“To walk in purity, a Lady in Waiting must first guard the key to her heart.” 

(from Lady in Waiting, by Jackie Kendall and Debby Jones)

Image from reusableart.com

Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life. 

(Proverbs 4:23)

A Pure Heart

Today's post is a chapter from "Beautiful Girlhood" by Mabel Hale

Originally published in 1922, it is now Public Domain

Photos by Amanda T.

“Blessed are the pure in heart: for they shall see God.”

What a pleasure to look forth upon the earth on a clear morning after a snowstorm, when over all is spread the covering of pure whiteness, hiding every defect and blemish, surmounting all that is unclean and ugly, transforming every stick and clod into things of beauty, leaving only blue sky above and pure whiteness below! Or what a pleasure to stand at the brink of a clear, calm pool, looking into its depths without observing one thing unclean, and then to put to your lips a cup of the crystal liquid fresh from the spring that feeds the pool, and drink to your fill!

What a sense one feels standing on the top of the mountain height, far above the dust and smoke of the lower regions, and there drinking in the pure air, and gazing as far as the eye can carry in every direction, the sight unobstructed by the thickness and gloom of lower levels! Or, again, what a sense of the Infinite one feels out under the clear sky, there beholding the stars shining forth with all their beauty and brightness, pure revelations of the mighty power of God!

To look into the depths of a child’s innocent eyes and see there but the innocence and guiltlessness of one who has never sinned will soften the hard heart. To look into the clear, fearless eye of the man or woman whose heart is free from condemnation of sin, or to see the quietness and confidence of old age that has come to its own with cleanness of hands and purity of heart, gives strength to those who falter. The look of innocent pleasure in the eyes of a modest maiden gladdens all who behold it.

Everywhere purity and clearness are admired and appreciated. Pure air, pure water, pure food, pure associations, pure ideals, pure aspirations—all are needed for upright living.

The purity that counts for most in your life and mine is purity of heart. It is possible for us to live with the very seat of our affections cleansed from that which is sinful, and our hearts made pure. The heart can be made a fit temple into which to ask the Lord to come and be the inhabitant.

One of the things every young Christian girl soon becomes aware of is the natural sinfulness of her own heart. When she is trying to do that which is right, evil thoughts and feelings will arise. She is tempted to be proud and selfish; and under certain provocation she feels the workings of anger in her heart, though by looking to God for help she keeps her lips from speaking out her feelings. Sometimes she is startled by feelings of jealousy and envy, two things that must not be allowed in the life of a Christian. She will find it hard at times to follow the Lord fully, to entirely do His will. If she will seek out the real desire of her heart, she will find that she wants a closer walk with God; yet when she tries to walk closer she is all the more conscious of these sinful impulses. If she understood herself she would know she needed a pure heart.

If a girl will come to God with her perplexities and tell Him the struggle she is having with “foes within,” and fully consecrate her life to Him, saying from the depth of her heart, “Lord, I give my life to Thee. Thou mayest have every part of it. Cleanse my heart and make it a fit place for Thee to dwell,” and trusting God to do what she has asked Him to do, she may have a pure heart.

God will cleanse out those sinful principles from her nature and make her a conqueror. Not that she will no more be tempted; but instead of those inward struggles that are so hard to master, she will find inward grace and strength to overcome.

There is a heavenly Visitor who will come in and fill the heart that is fully given to God, so that instead of those sinful impulses ruling there, this sweet Spirit of God will reign.

The experience of heart purity is not for anyone who cherishes any thought or feeling that is impure. If envy, or jealousy, or pride, or arrogance, or any kindred evil is allowed a place, the Spirit of God will not come to cleanse and fill his temple.

It seems to me a most wonderful thing, this deliberate giving over of oneself and life for God alone. There is a rest of spirit, and a quiet confidence, a joyfulness, and a perfection of love and peace in the heart of the one thus given over to God that cannot be described in words. Nor is this experience for only a favored few. Everyone who will seek God with all his heart, who will draw close, may have this experience of a pure heart.

~~~

Some key phrases stuck out to me as I read this:

          The look of innocent pleasure in the eyes of a modest maiden gladdens all who behold it.

          Everyone who will seek God with all his heart, who will draw close, may have this experience of a pure heart.

Finally, the one that challenged me the most:

          The experience of heart purity is not for anyone who cherishes any thought or feeling that is impure.

One cannot love their lustful daydreams and expect to be pure.

Purity and Holiness

This week, we have looked at how important it is to stay pure before God. I would like to leave you with a few verses. If you notice, all of them mention holiness. Without purity of heart, we cannot appear holy before God.

Sanctify yourselves therefore, and be ye holy:

for I am the LORD your God.

That ye may remember, and do all My commandments,

and be holy unto your God.

But as He which hath called you is holy,

so be ye holy in all manner of conversation;

For God hath not called us unto uncleanness, but unto holiness.

Because it is written,

Be ye holy; for I am holy.

(Leviticus 20:7, Numbers 15:40, 1 Peter 1:15, 1 Thessalonians 4:7, 1 Peter 1:16)

I Want A Principle Within

Last Sunday, we sang this hymn in church and I thought it was an excellent prayer for girls who are striving to stay pure at heart.

I want a principle within 

Of watchful, godly fear,

A sensibility of sin, 

A pain to feel it near. 

I want the first approach to feel 

Of pride or wrong desire,

To catch the wandering of my will, 

And quench the kindling fire.

From Thee that I no more may stray, 

No more Thy goodness grieve,

Grant me the filial awe, I pray, 

The tender conscience give.

Quick as the apple of an eye, 

O God, my conscience make;

Awake my soul when sin is nigh, 

And keep it still awake.

Almighty God of truth and love,
To me Thy power impart;
The mountain from my soul remove, 
The hardness from my heart.
O may the least omission pain 
My reawakened soul,
And drive me to that blood again, 
Which makes the wounded whole. 
~~~
Words by hymn-writer Charles Wesley

2 Timothy 2:22

Picture and Scripture submitted by Rubies Like Ruth reader, Miriam.

"Flee also youthful lusts: but follow  

righteousness, 

faith, 

charity, 

peace,

Image from flowers.wallpaper.tc

with them that call on the Lord out of a pure heart." 

(2 Timothy 2:22)

About Miriam:

      "I am a saved, Christian young lady striving to serve the Lord with all of my heart. I love reading His Word (the Bible) and discovering what Christ wrote out in his "letter" to me. I have given my life to the Lord and it is His and His alone. 

      "I pray that the Lord will give me an even deeper passion for Him every day as He shows me what He wants me to do and directs me in my life. 

      "I am a strong supporter of Modesty, Purity and Courtship. I live with my family of six and are home-schooled with my siblings by my wonderful Mother. I enjoy playing violin, spending time with friends and family and practicing home-making skills, like sewing and cooking."

You may be interested in visiting her blog Maidens of Virtue