“Please forgive me for what you think I did.”
We’re excusers, defenders, and egotists by nature—our fallen nature. Our knee-jerk reaction is self-defense. And as Christians we often Christianize it with "un-apologies"—some as creative and meaningless as the one above.
 |
| Image from reusableart.com |
But there’s more:
• “I’m sorry you were offended” — a way to apologize without admitting blame.
• “ I’m sorry if I did anything to offend you”— vague enough to keep our ego intact.
• “Please forgive me, but….” — giving us the ability to tack on excuses and accusations thus voiding the apology.
• "You misunderstood" — allowing us to justify rude or selfish acts by explaining our motives (i.e. it's not what I did, it's what I thought that matters).*
We can’t do anything about others' un-apologies, but we can ask the Lord to free us from the bondage of our own self-defense.
Capture us by your love, Lord, so we can honestly repent of sin.
See James 4:8-10 and 1 John 1:8-10.
Unfortunately, all of these un-apologies I've heard or used myself.
* There are times when explanations are in order, but we often use this excuse to explain away things we've done wrong. Just because we didn't mean to be rude doesn't mean we weren't rude!
~~~
About Gail Puruth
Gail Purath has been married to her best friend for 41 years, has two married children and seven grandchildren. Her blog Bible Love Notes (http://biblelovenotes.blogspot.com) features one-minute devotions each weekday.
• “I’m sorry you were offended” — a way to apologize without admitting blame.
• “ I’m sorry if I did anything to offend you”— vague enough to keep our ego intact.
• “Please forgive me, but….” — giving us the ability to tack on excuses and accusations thus voiding the apology.
• "You misunderstood" — allowing us to justify rude or selfish acts by explaining our motives (i.e. it's not what I did, it's what I thought that matters).*
We can’t do anything about others' un-apologies, but we can ask the Lord to free us from the bondage of our own self-defense.
Capture us by your love, Lord, so we can honestly repent of sin.
See James 4:8-10 and 1 John 1:8-10.
Unfortunately, all of these un-apologies I've heard or used myself.
* There are times when explanations are in order, but we often use this excuse to explain away things we've done wrong. Just because we didn't mean to be rude doesn't mean we weren't rude!
~~~
About Gail Puruth
Gail Purath has been married to her best friend for 41 years, has two married children and seven grandchildren. Her blog Bible Love Notes (http://biblelovenotes.blogspot.com) features one-minute devotions each weekday.
No comments:
Post a Comment